A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule and a calculator.
At a morning press conference, Attorney General Alberto Gonzales said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement.
He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.
"Al-gebra is a problem for us," Gonzales said. "They desire solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values. They use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and referto themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medie val with coordinates in every country.
As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, "There are 3 sides to every triangle."
When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, he would have given us more fingers and toes."
White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the president.
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1 comment:
Hi Jeff
You would like my book Sat on a Tyre, it is almost a sequel to your blog. In a world where only those dealing with taxes are allowed to work with the evil numbers. After the arrest of Knickerman, accused of gathering statistics, only Master Pi stands in the way of Word domination. Keep up the good blogs.
Regards
David
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