Letter to Advocate - Sunday Dec 29, 2012

Dear Advocate,

I would like to thank Dr. Hamilton for acting quickly and decisively for "hiring security guards for all 12 elementary schools for the next 2 months to provide a visible presence and monitoring of visitors".  I am sure she heard from multiple members of the community expressing the need for heightened security on all campuses after the tragic events in Newtown.  I hope this quiets some of those immediate concerns

However, I am concerned that this action, much like the TSA screenings in airports, is only window dressing to make us feel safer but does not actually address the issue of actually making the schools safer.  Making people feel safer is certainly half the battle, but their is no guarantee that the person who is charged with this duty will be in the right place at the right time, if g-d forbid any action is actually required.  The second question that arises, is what screenings have these security guards gone through?  Are they qualified to work with children?  Do they have sufficient mental screening?  How will their training correspond to the increased security standards that Dr. Hamilton is implementing across every campus. 

What we must do is address the real long term concerns of our schools safety and security.  We must invest in improved systems that will provide real results, (adding bullet proof glass, reliable video systems, etc) that  will add real long term value.  Any person (3rd party, teacher, or administrator) standing guard is just a fixed cost that makes us feel better, but will not really prevent the next tragedy.  

In response to: http://stamfordpublicschools.org/filestorage/54/MemoFromSuper.pdf 

 

Monday Morning Thoughts (December 17, 2012)

A few thoughts for this Monday Morning 

1) Teachers - We love you. You do a great job. You guide, protect and educate our children. Hold your heads high and be proud, you have nothing to fear. 

2) We must move forward. This was an act of random violence, which we cannot control or protect our from our children. Did I hug my kids tighter this morning and let them get away with more this weekend

? You bet your sweet ass. But I cannot hold them out of schools or not let them on the bus because of what might happen. If we allow ourselves to be controlled by the heinous actions of sociopaths or mentally disturbed then they have won, and I will not allow myself to become a victim to those circumstances

A wish list for my kids

http://www.boston.com/community/moms/blogs/24_hour_workday/2012/05/motherhood-mom-enough-advice.html

I concur:

Here’s my wish list.

 

I hope I raise a child who says “thank you” to the bus driver when he gets off the bus, “please” to the waiter taking his order at the restaurant, and holds the elevator doors when someone’s rushing to get in.

 

I hope I raise a child who loses graciously and wins without bragging. I hope he learns that disappointments are fleeting and so are triumphs, and if he comes home at night to people who love him, neither one matter. Nobody is keeping score, except sometimes on Facebook.

 

I hope I raise a child who is kind to old people.

 

I hope I raise a child who realizes that life is unfair: Some people are born rich or gorgeous. Some people really are handed things that they don’t deserve. Some people luck into jobs or wealth that they don’t earn. Tough.

 

I hope I raise a child who gets what he wants just often enough to keep him optimistic but not enough to make him spoiled.

 

I hope I raise a child who knows that he’s loved and special but that he’s not the center of the universe and never, ever will be.

 

I hope I raise a child who will stick up for a kid who’s being bullied on the playground. I also hope I raise a child who, if he’s the one being bullied, fights back. Hard. Oh, and if he’s the bully? I hope he realizes that his mother, who once wore brown plastic glasses and read the phonebook on the school bus, will cause him more pain than a bully ever could.

 

I hope I raise a child who relishes life’s tiny pleasures—whether it’s a piece of music, or the color of a gorgeous flower, or Chinese takeout on a rainy Sunday night.

 

I hope I raise a child who is open-minded and curious about the world without being reckless.

 

I hope I raise a child who doesn’t need to affirm his self-worth through bigotry, snobbery, materialism, or violence.

 

I hope I raise a child who likes to read.

 

I hope I raise a child who is courageous when sick and grateful when healthy.

 

I hope I raise a child who begins and ends all relationships straightforwardly and honorably.

 

I hope I raise a child who can spot superficiality and artifice from a mile away and spends his time with people and things that feel authentic to him.

 

I hope I raise a child who makes quality friends and keeps them.

 

I hope I raise a child who realizes that his parents are flawed but loves them anyway.

 

And I hope that if my child turns out to be a colossal screw-up, I take it in stride. I hope I remember that he’s his own person, and there’s only so much I can do.